We have all heard the old saying. Men only want one thing, correct? While there certainly is some truth to that, it all is based on what you’re looking to get out of a relationship. Certainly if you are looking for casual sex, well then the plan is pretty simple. After all there are even websites out there today only devoted to casual hookups.
But if you’re reading this or you’re subscribed to my blog, you aren’t just looking for that casual hookup. In fact you are looking for that deeper connection with that special guy.
I will tell you the secret though. Once you have that truly emotional quality connection with that special guy the sex is mind blowing. Despite what society wants you to believe, we cannot deny human nature that when such an intimate act as sex is about becoming closer with that special someone it turns into something more amazing for the both of you.
Why did I start off with this?
I’m trying to not make a gross overgeneralization, but a lot of the women who I have worked with have all shared the same story. “I met this amazing man.” “We had such an amazing night in bed together.” “Now he is distant and isn’t responding.”
Could this man be a player? Of course he could.
This is where though we look to weed out the players from the quality man you want to build a deeper connection with. After all, players won’t want to engage in this process.
How to build a solid foundation with a special man.
Foundation Step 1: It’s not about you pleasing him.
There is a bit of a caveat to this. In a healthy relationship it is important for both of you to be able to please each other. This is where ladies if you’re head over heels for a guy, sometimes you tend to go overboard. You give your all and do things that you do things that you feel that he would like. While this is a good thing, the thing is don’t overdo it. Yes, be nice. Yes, be kind. Those should be the undertones and the icing on the cake.
Foundation Step 2: You’re the prize.
Think about it, you are worth it. A lot of women are lovely, kind, and wonderful people. Why would you not think of yourself as worthy? What are some of the good things and the quality things that you bring to the table in a relationship? Before you start listing a slew of negative things, read the next step.
Foundation Step 3: Men aren’t looking for perfection.
Sure we do want a woman who tries to care for herself, both body and spirit. Here is the thing though, men are turned off by women who will treat them or others like garbage. This is regardless of if they are a model or not. I’m going to do an article on this topic in the near future. Don’t compare yourself to other women, and only focus on yourself.
Foundation Step 4: Let him be the one to please you.
Men are powerfully drawn to anything that makes us feel wanted and irreplaceable. It is almost impossible for us men to feel in love if we didn’t earn it. In fact a woman who knows her worth, takes care of herself, and making that man feel like we are the only man for the job in your world. You have a recipe for success.
Every man’s underlying need.
There is a hidden, emotional need in a man’s heart that leaves him feeling constantly unsatisfied. I guarantee you that nothing else in this world can satisfy this need like a woman. Most men will try to fill that need with frivolous things like material possessions, alcohol, and even casual sex. While this will cause a quick satisfaction for him it doesn’t leave him filled or satiated for very long. The mistake that a lot of men make is that we need sex to survive. What we need is to be loved and to feel important. How do you take all of this and unlock his heart. Even if he has become more and more distant?
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References:
https://huolab.psych.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/5/2014/03/Huo-Binning-Compass-2008.pdf
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/276378095_Smart_People_Ask_for_My_Advice_Seeking_Advice_Boosts_Perceptions_of_Competence
https://leighnoren.com/human-sexuality-blog/sex-and-lack-of-emotions-what-does-it-mean/